phase shift
my anally-clean phase seems to have ended, as of yesterday. my room is a frickin' mess and i have no desire to clean it.
my workout-like-a-nut-all-the-time-phase ended last fall but started again two weeks ago... and seems to have ended again, as of yesterday. today i consciously slept through my morning workout and i feel no guilt for this. well, ok, maybe a little.
my desire-to-work-really-hard-all-the-time phase seems to have ended for good... months ago. like, right after my thesis was handed in. and i really really can't seem to get it back. is it the fault of me? or an un-inspiring job? or something else altogether?
my cooking-cool-new-foods phase ended about two months ago when my travels began. now i only like eating olives, gruyere, and beer for dinner. okay, i force other foods in my mouth, too. but it's only because i feel guilty eating my wonderful little meal of olives, gruyere, and beer.
recently, i went through a phase where i was frugal and tried to pay off all my debts. mentally, i am still in that phase, but somehow i don't seem to REALLY be in that phase anymore. for instance, i might go buy an ipod tonight.
at least my drought is finally over. that's a great phase to end!
and my i-hate-san-francisco phase seems to be nearly over, too. that's good news.
my flip-flops-only phase is in no danger of ending. so don't worry.
neither is my starbucks-in-the-morning phase.
i also started a new phase. one where i engage myself in repeated intense, internal, mental & emotional reflection. it kept me from sleeping well last night. it's not a bad thing. don't read this as i'm sad. it's more that i feel guilty sometimes for saying things or writing things that come out the wrong way. and then i hurt someone's feelings. and then i have to wonder what my problem is. why do i do such things? why do my words get read or heard the wrong way? am i in that much of my own bubble that i don't notice the damage i cause? that's the kind of reflection i seem to keep having lately.
so many phases. i wonder what next week will bring?
my workout-like-a-nut-all-the-time-phase ended last fall but started again two weeks ago... and seems to have ended again, as of yesterday. today i consciously slept through my morning workout and i feel no guilt for this. well, ok, maybe a little.
my desire-to-work-really-hard-all-the-time phase seems to have ended for good... months ago. like, right after my thesis was handed in. and i really really can't seem to get it back. is it the fault of me? or an un-inspiring job? or something else altogether?
my cooking-cool-new-foods phase ended about two months ago when my travels began. now i only like eating olives, gruyere, and beer for dinner. okay, i force other foods in my mouth, too. but it's only because i feel guilty eating my wonderful little meal of olives, gruyere, and beer.
recently, i went through a phase where i was frugal and tried to pay off all my debts. mentally, i am still in that phase, but somehow i don't seem to REALLY be in that phase anymore. for instance, i might go buy an ipod tonight.
at least my drought is finally over. that's a great phase to end!
and my i-hate-san-francisco phase seems to be nearly over, too. that's good news.
my flip-flops-only phase is in no danger of ending. so don't worry.
neither is my starbucks-in-the-morning phase.
i also started a new phase. one where i engage myself in repeated intense, internal, mental & emotional reflection. it kept me from sleeping well last night. it's not a bad thing. don't read this as i'm sad. it's more that i feel guilty sometimes for saying things or writing things that come out the wrong way. and then i hurt someone's feelings. and then i have to wonder what my problem is. why do i do such things? why do my words get read or heard the wrong way? am i in that much of my own bubble that i don't notice the damage i cause? that's the kind of reflection i seem to keep having lately.
so many phases. i wonder what next week will bring?
posted by megan at
6:14:00 PM
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